


Crying Blood and Bleeding Tears

by TheAbsolute18



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Anxiety Attacks, Blood and Injury, Blood and Violence, Bromance, Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul | Ten-centric, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Flashbacks, Gen, Healing, It Gets Worse Before It Gets Better, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Protective NCT, Rape Aftermath, Rape/Non-con Elements, They all need a hug, Triggers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-22
Updated: 2021-01-17
Packaged: 2021-03-07 20:21:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 7
Words: 15,756
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26603623
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheAbsolute18/pseuds/TheAbsolute18
Summary: His finger nails are digging into the tiles, laughter surrounding him and then he is encased with pain and harsh sounds of exertion from behind. He tries to call out again, voice pleading for someone to save him, to help him escape their clutches. But no one comes.“No one is coming...”...With a night gone terribly wrong and the events paving their way into their lives to haunt their group in an unimaginable way, will the members be able to come together to pull through this tragedy and help their member to heal?
Comments: 24
Kudos: 119





	1. Broken

**Author's Note:**

> WARNING: Please read the tags before reading as this story may be disturbing to some viewers.
> 
> Hello everyone, so this story took me a while to actually start because I know that it is a very touchy subject so just to give a major heads up, this could be a trigger to anyone who has suffered from any form of sexual abuse/assault. More importantly, I wanted to stress the fact that regardless of gender it can truly happen to anyone. Without further ado, please enjoy and leave a comment with your thoughts!

His head is heavy and filled with voided thoughts, dancing around him are bodies carelessly swaying to the rhythm of the song and smacking hard into his own. They feel the music spreading through their body and their form feels like liquid beneath him. 

Hands are on his wrist and he feels himself being led away from the crowd, missing the feeling of warmth that they brought him. The hand is firm and is directing him through a hall and into another room where the lights are dim and red causing pulses to go through his head. His skin is crawling and he can barely register the other's body as it forces his back against a wall. 

That’s when the panic sets in and his shoulders go rigid, his hands quickly push back against the other's chest as their lips trail up their neck, lustful and greedy leaving slick trails of saliva in their wake. 

“No…” is all he can mumble as he feebly tries to push the other away. There is laughter behind them and he just barely registers the light from a phone that the other is aiming in their direction. His mouth fills with bile and his body seems to be working against him as the voice of the other whispers senseless words into his ear.

His world is spinning, he feels his body hit the floor first, and hands making their way up to his sides. He’s cold but warm all over and his mind goes blank but pain captures his body pulling him away from the darkness that was beginning to encase him and realizes that his face is wet with tears and there are grunts and laughter amalgamating with harsh sobs slithering past his lips. 

He’s begging and pleading his words only mumbles amidst the cries as they’re forced against the ground. They’re terrified and painfully aware of what is happening but their body is too heavy and lucid for them to fight back. 

He feels a cloth forced into his mouth and he practically chokes, there's a hand on his shoulder and one entangled in his hair and suddenly his head is forcefully struck against the ground once, then twice. 

He can barely breathe at this point his visions going dark as the individual begins shucking his pants down his thigh and everything is blurring around him, only to be brought back again to the sounds of harsh gasps and noises behind him. Every movement of the figure sends chills and pain through his body. Hands are clawing at his thighs, fingers digging deep into his flesh and streaking blood down his bare hips. Then his world is gone again, and all he can see is darkness and the gasped words that echo through his thoughts. 

-

The music hits the artists first as they step into the club, figures are dancing wildly below them on the dance floor but they’re just here to find Ten knowing that this was the place that he had invited them to meet after their practice. 

Mark’s eyes skim past the many different figures to find that Chit’s is not amongst them, they had meant to arrive earlier had they not been held back with the directors wanting to go over some of their upcoming stage performances. He and Johnny had honestly considered asking the other to hang back with them but also knowing that he became antsy after working and only wanted to go and escape the craziness of the days for an evening out. 

He turns to see Johnny with his phone to his ear, clearly calling the other only to pull it down after a moment to search the crowd again. “Maybe he got cold feet and decided to head back, or he found himself a date.” Mark tries to joke, as he walks away from his hyung looking over towards the bar wondering if he had drunk himself silly and went to empty the contents of his stomach.

He soon finds himself glancing back down at his phone looking at the last text that he had sent him wondering if perhaps he had just forgotten that they were coming and decided to go elsewhere; to be honest he was hoping that he did because if Taeyoung had anything right it was that bars and clubs were the worst places to be on a day before the weekend.

“He’s not answering his phone, I guess we’ll meet up with him whenever he decides to show his face,” Johnny states before throwing one last look over the many different faces. 

“I’m going to check the bathrooms, see if he went there after drinking himself into oblivion,” Mark says still observing the individuals as they lose themselves in the music and for a moment he questions why he agreed to come along. 

After a moment of consideration, he finally begins to slowly edge through bodies that are covered in sweat and the smell of alcohol, their laughter ringing in his ear as he desperately forces his way through them. 

Out of the mercy of the music and the lessening clusters of bodies he makes it away from the craziness and is walking down a long hall where the lights are a dim red just barely illuminating the two forms in the corner that are smothering each other’s faces with lustful kisses and soft noises. 

His eyes desperately try to stare anywhere but in their direction as he heads towards the restroom hoping to find his Hyung so that he could talk him into leaving early because this place was just rubbing him in all the wrong ways. 

His hand reaches out giving the door a harsh shove before he is greeted by the harsh squeal of the door. There are several stalls trailing the wall bits of rust building along their sides. He gives a quick glance seeing that every stall appears unoccupied and slowly steps further in where he is met with the vile smell of sweat and vomit. 

He coughs at the vileness of it but continues making his way across the white tiles that have clearly seen better days in the prime of their installment.

His feet carry him further, the bathrooms a-light with the same red lighting from the hall making it seem sensual in a way. His eyes scan each stall before he finds himself standing two stalls from the last where fingers are peaking out through the stall door. 

His breath hitches for all of the right reasons, he recognizes the rings and chains that are linked around the frail wrist and slender fingers, and before he can think he is running towards them and pushing the door open being careful not to hit the form sprawled across the ground what he sees sends him reeling and his legs give way beneath him, breaths coming out in forced gasps.

He is barely able to focus on the other body and he is holding back nausea that has taken all sense from his body. “Oh god...” he practically sobs and the only thing he can think to do is reach for his phone where his trembling hands quickly dial the only number they can think of.

\- 

Johnny is still standing near the entrance waiting for the rapper to return, his mind wandering to the events that they were preparing for, and wanting nothing more than to just spend the rest of the evening with his brothers. 

He feels his phone vibrating against his pant pocket and quickly reaches to snatch it away from the material hoping that it’s the young dancer so that he could tear him a new head for making them worry but stops when he sees mark name flashing across his screen. 

He quickly answers and pulls the phone to his ear where his heart sinks to his stomach at the sound of the young rappers trembling. 

“Oh god Hyung...” the other is sobbing, their words just mixing together with the sound of his now racing heart. “Hyung I, oh god...” his sobs are interfering with his words, and god Johnny can barely speak. 

“Mark. Mark where are you?” Johnny gets the words out as he pushes away from the entrance and begins making his way through the growing crowd. But the other isn’t answering and Johnny’s voice becomes more demanding. “Mark, where are you?” 

“The bathroom…” His sobs are raking through his chest and Suh can barely understand anything else. “I’m so sorry, Hyung.” Is all he hears before he is forcing people out of his path and bounding towards the bathrooms ignoring the curses that people are throwing his way.

And then he’s standing there, staring down at the half-naked form that lays in a crumpled heap in the middle of the dirty tiles, his chest is still moving little heaves up and down but there is blood caked to the side of his head and thighs and his shirt is sticking to his back that appears to be bleeding as well. 

He moves forward more slowly now, timidly as he processes what he’s seeing knowing full well what they did to their brother, knows from the fact that half of his clothes have been removed and the start of bruises forming beneath the skin, knows from the blood and fluids and blood that lie beneath him. 

He falls to his knees beside the other mindlessly removing his jacket to place over the top of the exposed skin, his eyes turn back to Mark whose lying in the corner of the stall, legs curled up to his chest and phone still in hand cries still making their way past his parted lips and just in between his sobs he hears the words uttered again like a mantra, ‘I’m sorry, I’m so sorry Hyung.’

And that’s when everything clicks and the elder quickly grabs his phone from his pocket tentatively dialing 119 and directing Mark to call Taeyong because that is the only other person he can think to call at this moment. 

His eyes fall back to the small form and he can’t help the bile that rises in his throat. He can’t help but stare at the swelling around his throat or the blood that was collecting under his head causing his blonde locks to stick to his skin. 

He hears the 119 operators in his ear and the distant sound of Marks cries behind him as he’s talking fervently into the phone. 

“What’s your emergency?” The voice says, and he doesn’t know how to respond, because the bile in his throat is making him light-headed and queasy. His mouth is dry and he’s just staring at the other and thinking of the horror he had endured but he is pulled back to reality when the person on the phone asks the question again.

“My friend.” He gasps out trying to breathe past the building anxiety. “We need help...” 

He needs help...


	2. From hell

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again! I am happy to have received much love for this story and pray that you will continue to love it. I will be going through this for the next week to edit this as well. Thank you for reading.

The evening was quiet, the sound of music was drumming through his ears as he laid placid against the bed, his body heavy with exhaustion from their arduous schedule. He remembers just briefly telling the others that he was going to crash for the evening before grabbing a shower and crashing on his bed.

They had been working non-stop for this comeback and they were all probably feeling the whoas of their upcoming album. Tonight, however, they had had the luxury of ending their practice early and was given the rest of the evening to do whatever they pleased. Most of them decided to head back and crash early, whilst some chose to go out and enjoy the evening. 

He lets out a long tentative sigh, allowing his body to fall back into the comfort of his bed where sleep pegged at his tired eyes. However, this peace does not last long before he is being pulled from this momentary respite by the sound of his ringtone going off in his headset. 

He raises the phone, watching as Mark’s name dances across his screen and scrunches his forehead in concern. The younger never called him on a night out with the others unless it was an emergency. He finds himself having to calm his running thoughts before answering the phone to what was probably an accidental dial but feels his apprehension heighten when he hears the others panicked voice coming through the phone. 

The other is sobbing, their words barely decipherable as their cries are cutting through their sentence. “Hyung,” He cries, voice breaking with another sob. “Oh god, hyung. I’m so sorry.” 

At this point, his heart is beating in his ears and he is sitting up straight in the bed desperately trying to make out what the other is saying. “Mark? Mark!?” He starts, throwing his feet over the mattress and grabbing his coat off of the desk chair before heading towards the door, his pulse is racing in his chest and he is just trying to get the other to answer him. “Where are you?” 

His head is spinning and his mind going blank as he tries to make out the other's words before stumbling out into the hall smacking hard into Jaehyun’s shoulder but barely able to slow his steps as he rushes towards the entrance. 

“Tae?” The other calls after them but they don’t stop, they need to get there, he needs to get to his brothers. 

“Just hang tight.” He tells him through the phone before disconnecting the call and chucking the device onto the passenger whilst his hands work to start the engine and before he can think his foot is pressing down on the gas pedal and he’s on the road before he can think about where they are going. 

-

It all happened too quickly, his head is heavy and there are familiar voices, and a warmth now overlapping his exposed skin. He feels sick and his body aches against something cold and hard beneath him. His eyes try to pry their way open but are too heavy with sleep to make it far. He finds himself trying to speak but mumbles wordlessly to the panicked voices instead. 

With this he attempts to shift his body only to find that it feels like lead, he wants to reach out, to touch something anything, but his body works against him and he finds his mind wanting to sleep again, so he does, he lets his body slip back into the dark abyss and wakes again to feel his body being lifted. He feels as light as a feather but there is also unspeakable pain that is radiating through him in waves.

These voices are calmer and unfamiliar to the ones he heard moments ago, had it only been moments? And is someone crying? His head feels too jumbled, he wants to ask what’s happening, to open his eyes but he can’t and suddenly he’s no longer thinking and he can feel his body moving, gliding gently through the air and then there’s just silence. 

-

Taeyong couldn’t even remember how he got there, doesn’t remember the drive or the arrival, he just recalls pulling the car to a stop and seeing the flashing lights from the ambulance and police cars that are surrounding the club. 

The leader moves past them with practiced grace forcing his way into the building without a moment to more to spare, because all that is on his mind is that he needs to find Mark and Johnny to know what happened so that he could help them. 

His feet carry him across the stained grounds of the club which smells of cigarettes and sweat leaving a dry taste in his mouth. The young leader finds himself standing in front of an officer who is guarding the entrance of a hall keeping people out of the area, but he doesn't have time to waste and continues to move forward only to be stopped by one of the officers who catches his shoulder and Taeyong can’t help the look of annoyance that comes across his face. 

“My friends.” He starts, looking down the corridor where he sees Marks blonde tresses and without another word he forces his way past the officer who thankfully does not give much push back. “Mark!” He calls out and watches in horror as the other turns to meet his gaze eyes swollen and shoulders slumping making him look all too vulnerable under the glare of the red lights. 

Taeyong barely makes it to the other before he collapses into his embrace his body shaking violently with sobs as he clutches his hyung’s shoulders. His small frame is shaking so horribly as he mumbles incoherent things through harsh sobs. He had honestly never seen the youngster like this, it was alarming, to say the least. The older boy wraps his hands securely around his shoulders pulling him close though the feeling is still unusual to him, he doesn’t show this kind of affection so it feels foreign in a way. After a moment he moves the smaller boy away, tilting his head down to look at him and assuring him that he was going to be right back and to stay where they were. 

He steps into the bathroom, his eyes falling to the aged tiles and then following them to the last stall where Johnny stood standing against the wall, head lowered as an officer spoke to him. The elder member just nodded solemnly looking deep within his own thoughts. He looked ill stricken, skin pale with his hands tucked securely at his sides where he could see that the fingers that were clutching to the fabric of his shirt were stained red with blood. 

“Hyung?” Taeyong starts walking tentatively towards them and he is greeted by the officer's disapproving stare but he doesn’t care he walks over to the taller member whose shoulders stiffen and looks in towards the now empty stall where he sees smears of blood across the tiles and a piece of fabric that is laying in the center of it all. “What happened?” The words are caught in his throat, and somehow he knows, his gut is clenching and he feels dizzy the feeling is all too familiar but he keeps himself on his feet for the other. 

The tears fall first, one trail followed by the other in two slithering rainfalls before a gasp escapes him and he comes undone before his leader. 

“Oh god,” Johnny’s hand is over his mouth and he’s leaning forward hand on his knees drawing in deep inhalation’s through choked cries. “We should have been here...” his voice is broken and rasping as the sobs continued to shiver through him. “I should have made him... he should have waited, oh god Yong.” 

Tae finds his hands wrapping around the others form drawing his body in towards his chest with his mind still racing with thoughts and finally he asks the daunting question again.

“What happened?” His voice is soft against the other's head he wants to know but also wants to hear a lie, to hear something different from what he knows. 

“They fucking raped him...” his voice breaks with this and suddenly the weight of the other falls into him causing him to lose his footing as they crumble to the floor. “He must have been terrified...” His voice is low and the pained sounds and hiccups are cutting his words short. “That fucking bastard...”

Taeyong shushes the older member, hands running through their brown locks whispering words of comfort into his ear to calm him. He can barely think at this point, head void, and filled with contrition and his body is like led against the tiles. 

What had they done to their dancer? Had he been scared, did he even know what happened? Was he conscious? Was he even okay? They needed to stand, he needed to see where they had taken him, he needed to call their manager, there was so much that he needed to do but he couldn’t find the strength to do so, he hears an unfamiliar voice behind him and finds himself glancing over his shoulder to see the officer who was once glaring at him now looking solemn and understanding of where they were coming from. 

“We’ll need to have you moved out of here so we can block this area off.” The officer informs them, eyes barely meeting the leader's gaze as he gathers the other into his arms and pulls them to their feet before guiding him towards the door. 

“I need to get to the hospital,” Tae informs him slowly as they make it into the hall where Mark now stands with a law informant giving them his statement whilst trying desperately to hold himself together. “Are you going to be okay?” 

Johnny nods before meeting the other's gaze and wiping vigorously at the tears that were still continuing to stream like a fountain of emotions. “We’ll meet up with you.” He says through a raspy voice, shaking and quivering with each breath. 

With this, Taeyong hangs back for only a moment more before reluctantly leaving the others behind and making his way to the entrance where a crowd of news reporters and eager eyes had gathered waiting to get a piece of the news and leading them to wonder if they had seen them going in and one leaving on a gurney? Had they known what happened? 

Before he knows it he is whipping out his phone pulling up his hoodie and jogging towards the car. He makes it there without catching the lingering eyes of demons and hears the other voice answering from the other end.  
“Hello?” 

The voice belongs to their manager, and suddenly his throat is tight, his skin is crawling and he wants to pull himself into a ball and hide away from this, he feels sick and gross everything is a ball of anxiety but he is pulled back again by their manager's voice. 

“Hyung-nim,” he starts, the air around him is heavy but he forces the next sentence out. “Ten, something happened, it’s really bad hyung.”

-

He wakes with the sound of low hums and noises that are repeated beeps, obnoxious, and prominent. His body feels heavy and the lights above his closed eyes are too bright. His mind is swimming trying to piece this together, he inhales slowly smelling sanitizers and the distinctive smell of a hospital, death, blood, and foreboding fluctuation of eras surrounding him. 

He struggles to open his eyes against the light, can hear voices around him, one familiar and warm and he wants to reach out to it, to clasp their hands in his to feel something that makes sense. But his body refuses to work with him. And instead, he finds himself falling back into the mattress only to realize that he is laying on his side with a pillow resting behind his back. 

The dancer aches worse than he does after six hours of nonstop dance practice. He tried to move his lips, tried to reach out to the voice tries to speak to them to call out to their Hyung, his fingers clutch feebly at the sheets and a soft moan makes its way past his lips, his brows knit from the exertion of movements and the vibration of his vocals sends chills through his body. 

Chit opens his eyes to see walls surrounding him, voices whispering in his ears and weight against his small form. hands are against him forcing him against the ground and there is a voice encompassing this soft and comforting one, a hand is on his intertwining their fingers whilst the other works their way through his overgrown locks pushing them from his face. 

“Shhh.” The voice coos like honey dripping from a spoon to coat his nerves in assurance. “I’m here Ten, hyung’s here.” 

Warmth is radiating through the others embrace and he feels himself relax against the covers. He tries to move his lips, tries to form a sentence a word at this point, and yet nothing comes but a light cry and then he feels himself slipping again, falling back into the dark pits of slumber, and feels their leaders hand slowly move from his hair to rest on his cheek, praising him for resting, for doing something that every human does but it feels nice, feels familiar and makes sense to his tired mind. 

-

Taeyong watches as the other's body stills against the gurney, fingers un-twining as he rests them back against the covers hoping that the other does not wake once he shifts away from the smaller dancers' body. 

He looks back to Kun who had shown up after hearing the news along with their manager who looked half-awake with their black locks sticking up from different angles, and loose clothes hanging from their lean frame. He felt bad knowing that Youngjae was probably just as tired as they were and just as concerned and stressed about the matter.

“You should head home, we’ll stay with him and keep you posted.” Taeyong offers before looking back at the small frame laying amongst the bed and finds himself pulling the blanket up over his shoulders as a means to keep him warm.

“No, it’s probably best that I stick around.” He responds before rubbing his fingers over his eyes to feebly rub the sleep away. “I’m going to grab some coffee though. I will bring you some back if you want.” 

The others give a nod of agreement before watching their manager exit the room where an uncomfortable silence falls amongst the two. 

They can still barely believe that this happened, that within the course of an hour everything went to shit in a handbasket and now they are standing in a hospital room hours later with their member's unconscious form lying amongst the bed with scars on his back that the doctors said was etched into the word ‘baby’ and a permanent scar to his psyche in which they were all but hopeful that he didn’t remember. The thought of it sends shivers down the leader's spine and vile up his throat. 

How scared had he been when he tried to fight back only for his body to be useless, had he begged? Had he called out to them for help? God, the thoughts make his head pound and his heart quicken, then there is a voice at the front of the room and he turns to see Johnny entering through the entrance, he looks awful, hair in shambles eyes sunken and red, skin as pale as freshly fallen snow and there was blood still covering the cuffs of his shirt but his eyes are just trained on the bed, looking over the other's body as his chest slowly rises and falls. 

“What,” he starts to make out but seems to question himself before trying again. “What did they find?” 

“They weren’t able to find any traces or DNA samples, they are running some tests on what was found but nothing damning enough as of yet.” Kun cuts in before Taeyong is able to answer, and to be honest, he is grateful for it. “The police are looking over some security footage to see if they can trace something that way was the last thing we heard from manager-nim.” 

Johnny only nods at this with a visible gulp that makes both of them look away as to allow the other to process the information. 

“When I find the bastard who did this,” Johnny’s words cut short as he tries to keep himself from falling apart. “I should have told him to hang back.” 

“No,” Taeyong says this too quickly, his voice laced with concern at the others words. “Don’t blame yourself for this, you did not force their actions.” The words come out calmer now but with an edge that dares the other to argue this fact. “The only thing we can do now is try to find these fuckers who did this to him, and not blame ourselves for something that was out of our control, okay?” 

Johnny tried to nod, but this was within his control, all it would have taken was for him to ask the other to hang back, to kill his radiating excitement so that they could leave together. That is what it would have taken to prevent this. Their leader was wrong, or at least that is what he was telling himself. 

“Hey, I need to head back to update the others, why don’t you head back with me and we can clean you up.” Kun starts before approaching the taller member. “Tae-Hyung can watch him from here.” 

Without allowing the other to agree he reaches out and grabs his arm before giving Taeyong a nod and heads towards the exit without much of an argument from the other. The ride back to the dorm was quiet and he has to glance towards the other just to ensure himself that he is still here with him. The taller boys brown locks are obscuring his eyes from his view and all he can see is the slight tremble in his fingers as he stares down at the blood on his sleeve. 

“How was Mark?” Kun asks hesitantly, waiting a long moment before the other answers. 

“He went home with Taeil-hyung.” He finally utters, his voice is low, and sounds tired more like exhausted from the events. 

He barely remembers the drive he just recalls pulling up to the dorm where they exit the vehicle and head into their place where lingering eyes fall on them. Johnny feels his skin crawl beneath his coat, he feels the eyes linger on them as though they are judging their decision, they made a mistake. He made a mistake, and now they will live with this downfall forever.

Kun walks ahead of him, sliding smoothly into the dorm and glancing across the tired eyes before his attention falls to Mark whose body is curled in on itself, with his head resting on Yuta’s lap where the elder continues to card his fingers through his bronde locks. There is a blanket draped over his small frame but the young rapper looks haggard in his sleeping state, his eyes are visibly puffy from the crying and his skin is paler than usual. The whole scene makes him look his age. 

He shares a nod with the other vocalist before turning back to guide the other towards the bathroom to bathe and watches as Sicheng stands, eyes following his, they were probably itching to hear the updates but he just wanted to ensure that the other was in the washroom before giving them the news. 

The young leader knew that his brother would understand and watches as they take their seat again to look back down at his lap and continues to bounce his leg nervously. 

It was going to be a long sleepless night where they were barely going to catch an ounce of sleep judging from the fact that it was already two in the morning and they were still awake anxiously watching the minutes pass. But they were going to pull through this, they were strong like this. So was Ten, they would help him through this. They would be there every step of the way, he would heal and they would help him. 

However, the young leader did not know of the hell that awaited them, and the terrors that this evening's events would bring them and their group in the days to come as these malignant beings torment did not end in a single night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments feed my inspiration and kudos gives me life!


	3. No one is coming

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello lovelies! Sorry for the short chapter. I have been super busy but the next one will be longer. Please leave a comment with your thoughts!

There are hands all over him, pulling him deeper into the dark pits of hell. He feels terror encasing him, and he tries to scream but nothing comes out but a dry rasp. 

“I’m going to take good care of you baby.” Whispers the warm breaths against his ear as their hands wrap around his abdomen and give him a harsh tug. 

His finger nails are digging into the tiles, laughter surrounding him and then he is encased with pain and harsh sounds of exertion from behind. He tries to call out again, voice pleading for someone to save him, to help him escape their clutches. But no one comes. 

“No one is coming...” 

-

He wakes suddenly with a dull ache in his head, ears ringing and eyes filled with sleep. He feels less heavy against the comfort of the hospital bed, but there is an impermissible pain that is radiating through his lower back and up into his shoulders. 

He mumbles lucidly against the pillow, asking blindly for water to quench his dry mouth without fully comprehending the current predicament. 

There is a soft voice beside him, hands brushing through his long locks and asking him if he’s okay, but he doesn’t know how to answer this question. Was he okay? 

“Water.” He repeats in English because his mind is too boggled to find the Korean translation. 

The other doesn’t respond, instead they remove their hand from their locks and move to grab a water bottle from the desktop before walking over placing their hand under their head and bringing the water bottle to their lips. 

The cold water feels amazing against his dry mouth as it leisurely adds the much needed moisture to his parched tongue.

“Are you okay?” They ask again, their puppy eyes staring worriedly into his. 

“I’m fine,” he mumbles before craning his head to see where they are. “Youngie-Hyung, where are we?” 

“The hospital.” Tae responds almost solemnly before meeting their gaze again. 

“Why? What happened?” His head feels heavy again as he tries to recall what had taken place. And from the daunting look that forms on the leaders face tells him that it wasn’t good. 

Taeyong can not talk, suddenly his mouth is dry and he does not have the words to explain what happened. How was he even supposed to explain it? Does he even remember what happened? 

“Do you remember anything?” He goes with this question, it’s less constricting like this.

He finds himself just staring at the others pondering gaze before he eventually turns his attention back to the door wanting desperately to run and grab a doctor to tell him. But instead he turns back to the younger, whose eyes have darkened with what the other can not understand nor explain. They seem focused, yet exhausted for all of the right reasons, and something unfamiliar encases the dancers physiognomy, terror. 

“Hyung, I think...” his voice trails off as he fights to find the next sentence.

“Ten-ie,” he starts, “it’s okay, just breath.” 

And suddenly their surrounding are disappearing and he can smell the vulgar stench of the stalls and the voice cooing in his ear. “Tenie-ah, such a good baby, just breath.” 

He doesn’t find the next sentence and instead goes still and begins mumbling the endless words in a sort of mantra “nothing happened, it didn’t happen.” 

The words lead the other to confusion, had he remembered? What was he saying? He watches only for a moment before the other lets out a pure shriek and reaches up to cup his fingers around his ears crying even louder at the pain the sudden exertion caused. 

“Hyung!” He’s screaming now, voice strained but still as loud as ever. He’s terrified, his voice is pleading for them, for anyone. “Hyung, get them off!” 

Tae loses feeling in his legs, he can’t move, cants speak as the doctors begin shuffling into the room, one grabbing at the hands that had moved from his ear to tear at the skin on his neck, fingers shredding the skin in two and leaving a trail of blood in its wake. 

“Please!” He’s sobbing now, body thrashing against the nurses hold as he continues to cry out. “Hyung, help me! God, please!” His cries are forcing through his body in a brutal waive, small and frail enough, but strong in the rush of adrenaline. 

His cries continue for only a moment more before his body begins to still against the bed, pleads turning to soft mumbles and it takes the leader a moment to realize that one of the doctors was putting a sedative into his IV port. 

“Hyung, please... please...” his voice continues to fade until his body goes completely still against the covers.

Taeyong can’t stand it anymore, can’t take the pain and nausea searing through his chest. He wants to scream and to tear into something, before he can think he is practically bounding from the room and making his way quickly down the hall towards the bathrooms.

He barely makes it to an unoccupied stall before he is emptying the contents of his stomach into the toilet. His body is shaking and he can barely breath with his mouth mixing with saliva and vomit. His vision blurs around the edges, and his aching heart won’t calm. 

He feels his body fall back against the wall, to breath and wipe at the saliva on his face, he needed to calm himself down. Needed to be strong for the others. But everything hurts, there is an aching pain in his chest that begs for him to release it. 

What happened to him, why hadn’t he held them back. He should have kept them there for a while. He needed to protect them he failed as a leader. 

Taeyong rests his head against his knees taking sharp gulp at the air around him to keep himself calm, he needed to breath, needed to be there for him. But the thoughts of terror that the other went through leaves him feeling heavy and drained. He hears a soft voice outside the stall and it takes him a moment to realize that it belongs to their manager. 

He pulls himself up quickly, wiping vigorously at the contents on his mouth before exiting the stall to stare up at the taller figure. 

“I’m sorry.” He mumbles under his breath, voice barely a whisper. 

“Why are you apologizing?” He asks incredulously before taking a step closer. “Why don’t you head back. We’ll take it from here okay? There is a driver out front who can take you back.” 

Though to many it would have sounded like a suggestion but Taeyong knew that his manager was not leaving him any room to argue. So instead, he gives a bow to show his appreciation before stepping away from him. 

“Please keep me posted.” He says slowly before exiting the bathroom stalls and idly making his way to the elevator. He should stop by one last time to check on them, to see how they are doing but knows that it would be pointless since the drugs would have rendered him unconscious. He can still taste the regiments of bile in their mouth making him hiss in disgust before wiping at his face again with his palm. 

They barely recall making it into the lobby before their phone is buzzing in their pocket. His hand grasps at the devise and answers before completely checking the number. 

“Hello?” He starts, voice heavy with exhaustion. 

“Taeyong.” It’s Taeil’s voice, and it sounds urgent and forced. “It got out,” 

“Wait, what?” Taeyong stops near the double doors staring back at his own stunned expression in the glass. “What do you mean, what got out?” 

“I don’t know how, but they know. It’s all over the fucking media.” Taeil sounds like he is about to break a blood vessel with anger. 

Taeyong doesn’t say anything more to their Hyung, only pulls the phone away from his ear to pull up an accessible search engine where he types in their groups name and sees various articles that start dancing across his screen with blurry images of ambulances and the damnable stalls where this hell had taken place. 

This was too soon, how had they known?

“Tae,” the others voice is still ringing through his phone but all Taeyong now registers is the vans outside and a hand on his shoulder pulling him back into the building.

“Hyung.” Taeyong starts looking back at the managers panicked gaze. “How?”

How, within so little time?

“Someone leaked images.” His manager responds, his grip loosening on his shoulder. 

“What?”

“Some bastard released an image, an image from...” the manager stops, eyes looking distant as they visibly gulp past the saliva that had built up in their throat. “From the assault, they released it on a social media platform


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! First off. thank you for all of the love you have given my story@ I love you guys! Still, sort or shortish but the next one will be longer! Also,

It had been the most foreboding 72 hours of the rapper's life as he went in and out of the hospital and had finally spent a moment to actually sit in a chair with the young dancer lying across from him. The leader could have sworn that these seats were made to torture a loved one whose hearts were already ready to tear into two. 

The whole event had been a merry-go-round of catastrophe, with the news blaring with the information that was leaked onto the web and the many assumptions that were spreading around like a forest fire by netizens, and through all of this, the victim slept away in a deep slumber tucked away in a hospital room.

They had been so paranoid as to have assigned a guard to stand watch at the door out of fear that someone would attempt to invade the room whilst the idol slept. 

Taeyong finds himself carding his fingers through the other's messy locks, watching as the dyed strands fall back to rest against his palled face where his brows are furrowed and a light sheen of sweat was coating his forehead. 

He wants to coax his anxieties and knows deep down that the grimace is due to whatever nightmare might be lurking behind his closed eyes.

The doctor had informed them that the reaction he had two days earlier was due to the mixture of drugs that were still running it’s course through his boggled body since the dosage of Flunitrazepam was too high and was causing adverse reactions to the small boy's system. Not to mention that his injuries and the loss of blood were another damning factors of how his body was.

This in turn meant that these individuals were not pros at all in their work since they could have potentially killed the small boy had he not been found sooner, that was including the deep gashes in his porcelain flesh that they had inflicted. 

The thought of all this still makes the leader sick, had he not already emptied the contents of his stomach twice he may have just vomited again. 

He is pulled from his train of thoughts when a cup of coffee is held out to him and he turns to smile up at Taeil who had shown up only an hour ago to check on them. It was a scary situation, to say the least, and they all had too many questions that were left unanswered at this point. 

“Any updates?” Yong asks as he takes the steaming cup of black liquid from the eldest member before nodding his thanks. 

“So far, nothing. They could not track the IP address to whichever prick released those images but they are pretty sure it was released by the people who did this.” The older boy’s voice is filled with antipathy as he spits these words out like venom, and Yong honestly felt that if they had the assailants within their grasp that they would put an end to them without a second thought. “Has he woken?”

“Once or twice.” He responds over top of the lip of his cup, watching as the small frameshifts beneath the covers, lips moving to form unspoken words against the pillow. Without thinking he reaches forward to card his hand through his hair again whilst shushing the young singer before his body stills again. 

The eldest can barely believe that this is happening, they had heard about this kind of stuff happening but never to them, they were supposed to be untouchable and strong. But Ten of course was a different breed, he was snarky and elegant in every way. He was quick to throw a person off though and was cunning in a way that everyone liked. He was their smart ass and agile dancer who someone had hurt.

He glances back down at his cell phone, vaguely reminiscing on the images that had flashed across his screen, he could hardly believe that someone would post such a sickening and defiling thing for the world to see. The worst part was that the artist probably was unaware that half of the world was making assumptions on the images wondering if the picture of their half-naked member covered in his own bodily fluids with a blurry image of their face was real or if it was photographed? Regardless, the world was making sure that they made a show of it. 

After a long moment, he rests a hand on the leader's shoulder and gives it a light squeeze before advising that he go and get some rest whilst he stayed behind in case if they woke up. 

The thought was all but alluring; however, he couldn’t leave him, not now.

“Thanks, but if I go back now, I won’t rest.” His eyes meet the other brown ones and he sees the exhaustion reflecting in his hyungs eyes. But their attention is pulled back to the younger when they hear a soft-spoken voice talking to them.

Yong whips his head to the side to see tired eyes staring back into his, there are still dark circles beneath his glazed irises and his body is stiff with discomfort but he manages to speak this time.

“Hyung.” He starts, eyes glancing between the two. “Where are we?”

“We’re in the hospital, Ten-ie.” Taeil answers for what felt like the millionth time before sitting their coffee down and walking over to the other side. “How do you feel?”

The question is almost a joke, how else was he supposed to feel?

“Like I was hit by Lucas and Hyuck-ie in one of their petty fights.” The sounds of his voice is hoarse, but the lighthearted response makes Taeil’s heart flutter with hope. “What time is it?” 

Taeil scoffs at this, of course, they would be worried about the time, mind probably set on their schedule rather than his injured body. 

“None of your concern.” He replies simply before brushing the loose stands of colored hair from his face. “Are you in any pain?”

The other shakes their head and squints at the sudden jar of pain that slithers up their back and into their neck. 

What had happened? This was the one thought on his mind every time as he slowly pieced the previous events together trying to decipher what had taken place to cause this pain. 

Though with this lingering thought a feeling of trepidation sat heavily in the pit of his gut leisurely swirling in waves as it waited for his mind to put the puzzle together and complete the challenge. But he didn’t want to, didn’t want to admit that anything had happened, wanted to pretend that his dream was only a nightmare; however, the looks that were playing at the others physiognomy was only heightening this anxiety.

“Where’re the others?” Those were the only words he could think of, his throat was aching, and the thought of saying much more to explain who the ‘others’ were was physically tiring. 

“Mark and Johnny are back at the dorm.” This time it is the lead dancer who answers, eyes trained on the billowing clouds of steam coming from his coffee cup. “They’re fine though.”

“How many?…” The words are slow and cautious as though they are afraid that their question is going to burn their flesh before they continue. “How many people know?”

The two members grow still leaving the empty silence to linger between them as they stare away from the young vocalist neither wanting to address the question at hand but knowing that one of them would have to speak. 

“Listen,” Taeyong tries, shifting uncomfortably on his feet whilst trying desperately to form the next sentence. “You need to rest, we can talk about everything later…”

“What did they do…” The words quick and cut the other's sentence short without allowing them to continue. “To my back?” 

Yong’s skin goes as pale as the bedsheets at the question. He was their leader and yet he felt like a teenager in front of a wounded animal. How was he supposed to explain this to him? 

Your back is in fucking shambles? 

You have a permanent scar on your back that spells out baby? 

God, he was going to go mad with anxiety. 

He moves forward again, resting his hands at his sides before staring back at the young dancer who connects with their gaze. He had not wanted to have this conversation, wanted to beat the bush until it was nothing but broken branches and crumpled leaves, but they would not allow it. 

“Do you remember their face?” Tae finally says, the heaviness in the air tightening at the question, and he swears he sees the contrition berried deep in his chestnut gaze. 

The other responds with a slow shake of the head before attempting to shift their body. Their movements are sluggish and deliberate and the look of exhaustion is painted all over his features whilst he moves his limbs as though they are led. 

“I’m okay,” He mumbled when he sees Taeil move to grab his shoulders but stops at his words. “I need some water.”

The eldest nods before turning to leave and grab some water for the younger leaving the two in the still silence. 

“Let’s just leave it at this, hyung.” Ten says this with a placid face, but keeping his head turned away from the other. “It’s not worth causing drama over something small like this. It’s not worth the attention.” 

“Small?” The rapper can not hide the shock from his voice, had the other lost their mind? It would be a cold day in hell before he let this go, this was not a small matter like a playful slap being labeled as assault, they had taken something from their member, had defiled him in a way that was irreversible and he wanted them to just forget it? “Ten’ie, I don’t think you understand what happened? We can’t just let this go.” 

Ten’s gaze is sharp this time, but his features soften when he sees the concern there. He wants his hyung to understand, wants him to feel the embarrassment that he feels at this negative attention, wants him to feel how weak he feels curled up in this hospital bed. 

But he can’t and he knows that this will not pass with a few words; however, if he refused to continue with this, they would be forced to leave it, right?

He rests his head back against the pillow too exhausted to sit up as he had been trying to. He wants all of this to be over with, wants to be back in the studio dancing until his legs feel like jelly. 

“I just want to sleep then.” He knows that he should further address it, but he just can’t continue with this pointless argument.

He wasn’t broken, just empty. Something was missing and he could not place his delicate fingers on it.

Every part of Tae wants to argue with this response, but he had been here, knew what it was like to feel powerless and empty, to have something taken from you so heedlessly, Ten had been there for him though, had noticed the subtle bruising and the uncomfortable encounters with their producer had hung back to throw a light hand over his shoulder and wine when the producer tried to hold him back. 

But he hadn’t had the publics eyes staring at him, he had been able to hide the bruises from their wandering eyes and the emotional scars in order to keep their group functioning, and after a long, while the problem in his life had been transferred to another workplace and he didn’t have to worry, right? 

They let out a slow sigh before nodding back at them, allowing the other to close their eyes and rest whilst they stood by waiting for them to wake again. 

Seriously, what were they to do in this kind of situation? Would it be okay to let it go? Would the problem be solved in an evening or would it continue to plague at them? 

Taeyong waits for Taeil to return before he announces that he will be leaving first to head back and clean up. To be honest, he just needs to clear his head, needs to think this over. He was not going to allow this bastard to get away with this. Would not allow them to go about their day after what they did to his member. No, to his brother. They wouldn’t get that luxury, he wouldn’t let them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't hesitate to leave your comments in the section below! Thank you and stay safe out there!


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *TRIGGER WARNINGS* This chapter deals with some heavy stuff and flashbacks. Proceed with caution.

It had been a whole week, they had been forced back into their schedules with practices and shootings, acting as though nothing had happened. Their company had released a statement after the images had been leaked claiming that they were going to take legal actions against anyone who continued to make false statements regarding their idols, but this would not be pervasive enough to get the media to turn a blind eye. 

Not to mention, Their group had been a mess but Sicheng and Johnny out of all of the members had been withdrawn since the whole thing had erupted, Sicheng began going to the hospital after each practice to sit with him until the visiting hours were over and he was forced to leave his friends side. 

Johhny on the other hand had been completely withdrawn, eerily quiet and barely seemed to function on his own at this point. They had spoken to him, tried to offer assurance for their upcoming album but regardless of the reassurances, nothing would change what had happened. 

It had been a shock to them all honestly, Taeyong could see the hesitation in everything that they did and the constant anxiety etched across their foreheads. However, through all of this, the leader was just relieved that they were releasing their member from the hospital so that he could come back to their dorm and rest under the watch of his members. 

Taeyong had not spoken much to Chit since their last conversation as they did not want to cause any bad feelings between them and wanted to allow the dancer to process the matter before further discussions and bad decisions were made. Though, this information still sat as a weight against his chest since he had only told his leader that he planned to keep quiet and allow the matter to pass on since they did not want to pursue the case. 

But what was he running from? 

The thought plagued his mind too often throughout the week and he wanted nothing more than to rid himself of it. 

Of course, there was the media and the possibility of the matter getting out into the public but what would happen if they allowed this person to go waltzing the streets without being prosecuted for what they had done? 

The situation was uncomfortable all around and he just wanted to make it better but knew that was an impossible task when there was no possibility of going into the past to change what had happened.

The leader lets out a long sigh as they stare back at their tired gaze in the mirror wondering when the times had been so harsh. He hears a gentle knock on the door and turns to see Yuta peeking into the bathroom, hair pulled into a loose ponytail where the many strands of dyed tresses clung to his delicate face. 

“Ten’ie is back.” He says slowly watching as the other pushes away from the counter before giving them a nod of thanks before shucking on a loose jacket and following the other out into the hall towards the entrance of the house. 

He catches Sicheng as he walks in with the other's arm draped around his own trying to take the weight off of their adamant member who insisted that they were healed enough to move around without the help of their members. 

The silence that enveloped them was deffining, no one spoke or really knew what to say so they found a sanctuary in their silence. 

“Hyung!” The voice echoes out from behind them and Tae doesn’t have to turn around to know that the voice is Yangyang’s. 

The boy brushes past them with a practiced smoothness that they were all too familiar with. As he approaches the smaller member they can tell that even he is questioning the other's presence as they slow their pace and their stride comes to a halt just in front of him.

“You look like shit.” He declares before positioning himself along his other side and wrapping an arm under his shoulder to help take some of his weight. 

“Thanks, I missed you too baby.” Comes the snarky response before they start guiding him forward again towards his shared bedroom. 

The small dancer just wants to curl up under his covers and sleep away the pain medication and antibiotics to avoid infections from occurring. He can hardly bring his head up to meet their gazes and wishes most that he could vanish into thin air to escape the constant stares boring over his form and looming there with the feeling of contrition residing deep within their depths. 

Sicheng helps him to remove his jacket before lying him down on the bed with slow movements to prevent him from straining his stitches. Once he is lying on his side he pulls the blankets up over his shoulders and watches as they snuggle their head into their pillow eyes heavy with sleep. 

>He can hardly feel himself lying across the bed, just knows that the scent is familiar and that the fabric is welcoming against his skin.

“Rest for now Hyung,” He says before moving back to stand alongside Yangyang who stood at the end of the bed with his hands deep within his pockets and shoulders slumped. Their whole physiognomy gives off a wave of apprehension and concern. It was alarming, to say the least since WayV’s youngest never seemed to show this side of him.

Instead of addressing the concern he decides to wrap his hand over his shoulder and leads him from the room and out into the hall where some of the other members loomed waiting to see the other but Sicheng dismisses them and says it be best they let him sleep first. 

Taeyong stands at the end of the hall, wondering just how they were going to proceed with everything when his members seemed to be tearing apart at the seams, he had not even seen Johnny since this morning and Mark still seemed to be torn up over the whole event, clinging to Yuta’s side constantly to avoid confrontation or conversations with the other members. 

Were they even going to make it out of this?

The remainder of the day had gone by in a blur, and the week to follow was filled with quite chatters and uncertainty. The plus to the whole ordeal was that Chit had been up and able to walk around in short stints, and made it back and forth to the bathroom without much effort anymore. 

However, the facade that the Thai dancer was leaning on was fading, the snarky jokes were gone, the slow and delicate movements were stiff and the soft gestures he shared with the others was never there. He barely spoke more than five sentences in a day and spent most of it sleeping under a pile of blankets. 

Kun had left him many bowls of uneaten ramen and foods that would be soothing on the stomach. But today he needed to get him out of bed, he needed to bathe and eat or else he was going to fade away into skin and bone. 

The young man enters the room without so much as a knock and approaches the sleeping figure before pulling the blanket from his small frame to find him pulled into a small ball beneath the covers that had once hid him from their sight. 

His body is covered in sweat causing his clothes to stick to his frail form where his arms are tucked securely around his face. A soft moan can be heard escaping his chapped lips before he pulls them away to glare back at the taller frame. 

“You need to bathe Ten-ie.” He starts off with a coo almost to his tone, not wanting to come off harsh to the younger member. “And eat, and get some sun you look like shit.”

Without allowing the boy to argue he reaches down to pull him from the bed earning a long groan from the smaller boy. 

“Kun-ah.” He grumbled, hand grabbing at the other's wrist in a futile attempt to push him away. “Let me sleep, I am exhausted.”

“Exhausted and filthy,” Kun states. “When was the last time you bathed?” He knew the last time, it had been three days ago when they took him to the hospital to have the stitches removed by his doctor. 

They had hardly gotten him to raise a hand from his bed because all he wanted to do was hide and sleep. But not today, he couldn’t let him do this to himself any longer, he needed to be with them to lean on them so that they could help him to heal, they needed to be his brothers. 

He pulls the smaller boy from the bed allowing him to lean heavily on his shoulder as his head bobs to the side with exhaustion. He was becoming so frail at this point, body barely weighing a thing, and he truly was fading away from them with each passing moment. 

He barely manages to get the boy into the empty bathroom before sitting him down on top of the closed toilet seat and watched as he hunched forward as though his body were too heavy for him to hold up. 

“Do you need me to help you remove your clothes?” He asks, the question is hesitant though they had all been afraid to touch him, to have any skin-ship since the abhorrent events had taken place. He seemed all too fragile to them now and the thought of furthering his injuries both physically or mentally scared them. 

“No.” the word is quiet but holds a tinge of annoyance in it as he moves to pull at the shirt in an attempt to remove it. “You can leave, I don’t need you to watch me.” Ten tries to offer them a kinder tone, but he had drug him from the warmth of his solitude to make him bathe. He just wanted to sleep, because when his eyes were closed they didn’t have to deal with it, didn’t have to stand under the lingering stares and worried eyes. 

He hates this, hates the way he feels, hates the way that his shoulders stiffen at one of their touches, hates that even when he lays in bed for hours at a time that he still thinks of those whispers. Hates how weak he had become in only a day's time. 

Ten wants nothing more than to escape this, to escape everything. 

If he had the opportunity to, he would have stopped himself, would have waited to drink the liquid death that had led to those events. He would have waited for someone to be there, would have waited for Johnny and Mark to be there so he could ensure that he had a watchful eye. 

But that was all in the past now, and thankfully the photos that were leaked were easily covered up and now the actual events that had taken place that evening was only known amongst their group and the rest of their company, which Ten knew would never leave past those doors if they all valued their careers. 

Kun stands there for a moment longer just lingering behind the smaller form before stepping forward and extending a hand as he watches them struggle to pull the shirt over their head due to the injuries on their back that had been causing him trouble. However, he stops in his approach and mentally kicks himself for doing so, because as soon as his daesong notices the hesitation his hands drop, and his gaze levels with his. 

“Please,” The words were slow and shallow but filled with a lament that struck the vocalist like a slap in the cheek. “just go.” 

Kun only nods at this before quickly exiting the bathroom. He doesn’t harp on the question of what he did wrong, they had all been doing it. He would hate it too, they treated him like a prized piece of shallow glass, and every time they made to help him they would hesitate. 

It was maddening to say the least, but after the incident following his return home, who could blame them? 

The young dancer had woke in a frenzy and when Lucas had made to grab him as he tore at the flesh on his neck he went off, screaming at them not to touch him, at least that is what only Lucas could make of it since the boy was speaking in mumbles and rocking back and forth on his heels. 

The event left them all uncertain of what they could and couldn’t do, he didn’t want to be touched, didn’t want to be around them, he only ever wanted to sleep. 

Kun leans back against the wall before sighing heavily, they needed to get through this hump in the road and needed to be there, but why was this so difficult?

The singer looks up when he feels a soft hand on his shoulder and turns to see Taeil at his side with a reassuring smile on his face. 

“Give it time, you know Ten-ie better than any of us. He needs some space,” Taeil says this with such assurance in his tone, he seems like he knew the outcome of these events and he has to nod and gulp past the growing ball of emotions in his throat. 

“Mm’kay.” He responds before stepping away from the wall and sparing one last look at the bathroom wondering how long it would be before he exits. 

-

If it hadn’t been for the fact that the water had begun to turn cold he would have claimed the shower as his new solitude as it allowed him to wash away his stresses and the world around him. It felt alluring to allow the water to wash over his skin in soothing waves as it splashed away the sweat and grime from his skin. 

He hesitates mainly with washing his back since the wounds were still tender, and the thought of washing his skin only made him feel ill, the tender touches always seemed to send his mind whirling and pressure placed against his lower back and hips would send an arching chill through him. 

He reaches to turn the showerhead off, but hesitates. He had already washed himself five consecutive times, but his skin still felt filthy, so he reaches for the body wash again. The scent of lavender greeting him as he pops the lid open. 

Hendery would kill him for utilizing almost three-quarters of the bottle up, but he can’t get clean and he feels disgusting. He pours the lavender liquid into a rag before taking it across his skin, digging into the already dry and scraped flesh.

The feeling of anxiety builds in his chest again, and he tries to take a deep breath tries to talk himself through it but he doesn’t stop, just brings the rag to his neck where he rubs the material into his flesh, feeling the sting as it drags pieces of his flesh apart until there is little tendrils of blood slithering down his neck and intertwining with the clear liquids and bubbles that had formed. 

He feels the man's lips against his skin again, and the harsh movements of his body as he tried to reposition himself, he can hear his voice in his ear, and dull laughter behind him. 

“Baby,” He says, and Ten feels his gut clench and his shoulders go rigid. “So good for me, hmmm?” He can feel his body shaking against the cold water that is reigning over his body. “You asked for this, flaunting around like that.” 

He feels dizzy and nauseous and before he can stop himself he is leaning over in the shower and heaving beneath the rain of water. There are no contents in his stomach so all that comes up is fluids and bile. 

Their body is shaking horribly and he can’t bear to pull himself back up, he feels tears stinging in his eyes and pain radiating through his body in waves. 

Ten wants to run from this hell, but there is nowhere he can go, no one to save him from this inexplicable nightmare. 

The Thai member was so struck by these feelings that he had not registered the fact that he was screaming until his lungs were burning and his chest was aching as it pleaded for more air to fill their depleting lungs. 

His screams are echoing from the walls, shaking them around him. There are tears blinding his gaze but he can’t escape it, he had tried to forget, tried to push it to the back of his mind but they are stuck in this hell with a faceless man taunting him. 

“Baby, don’t stop.” The words are in his ear filled with sounds of pleasure and his desperate cries. The grounds are cold, and he has no control, he hears himself calling to his hyung, remembers the fear. “They’re not coming baby.”

He falls forward and his body drags him to his knees where his fingers clasp around his head. 

He feels their weight against his frame forcing him back into the ground as they struggle to break free, feels their harsh and labored breaths against his ear as they continue their assault their voice drowning to a harsh groan.

It won’t stop, won’t silence itself.

They aren’t coming, he is alone. 

Suddenly there are hands around him and he feels himself being pulled against the material of clothing with the water still dousing his body. 

The hands are gentle as they stroke through his wet locks pulling them closer and whispering gentle words into their ear. 

“It’s okay, I have you. Hyung’s got you.” Taeyong says this in a mere whisper as they continue to card their fingers into his locks. “I’ve got you now. I do.” 

However, the words don’t do anything to abate the sobs that continue to rake his small frame as he continues to cry and shriek against him before his fingers intertwine into the fabric of his shirt. 

They had never seen them like this, had never wanted to see them so broken as to where their body shook and screams of lament and fear continued to possess the air surrounding them. They were falling apart, and all he could do was hold him tightly in their most vulnerable state and hope that they would pull through. 

But this wasn’t the end, and he knows this, knows that it is not an overnight fix, and yet he selfishly hopes that this is the breaking point that he was needing to pull through this moment.

His wide eyes meet Taeil’s as he stands at the door, watching the scene play out before him, knowing that they were in for the longest ride of their life as he watches the sobbing form fall deeper and deeper into the others embrace as though they were clutching on to the last strand of their life. 

And little did they know that the bastard's raid had yet to end as the next weeks to come were unimaginable.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Jumps out from behind a brick wall of life* Hiya! Sorry for the super late update! Hope that you enjoyed reading this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it, the next chapter will be a dousy so please look forward to it! I love you guy's and thank you for your support and kindness!


	6. Through the Depth of Hell Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TRIGGER WARNING! This chapter contains some touchiness so just a heads up! If that is disturbing to anyone please do not read!

The week went by in a blur, they were all in a frenzy preparing fervently for their comeback whilst walking on eggshells around the topic of whether their member would be joining them in the weeks to come. They had been rather quiet amongst each other since the moment in the shower where the member had broken down and had spent a good amount of restless time in his bed. 

However, the plus side to those evening’s events was that the young dancer had begun to join them again and had even come to sit with them during dinner where he had made it through half a bowl of home-cooked ramen and even hung back to converse with Mark about their upcoming schedule. 

It was interesting to watch as they slowly began to try and piece everything back together through hesitation and patience. More importantly, they were happy to see their member coming back out and taking a step towards getting their health and mental state back in order. They had even begun speaking with a therapist, unfortunately, not at their own free will but rather by their manager who had threatened to remove him from their group until they were to seek out help. 

Though the company thought they were doing the appropriate thing, the other members believed that this should not have been forced upon the young man since they were already struggling to get them to even leave their room in the first place. 

At this time the young dancer sat in the corner of their dance studio watching as the others danced around to their new choreography whilst they stared on in anticipation wishing they could join in on the action but was advised by their doctor to hold out another week before jumping back into the swing of things. 

Ten watches as the others move rhythmically around one another in a practiced grace and smiles when he sees Mark jab back at Renjun after they had deliberately smacked into their shoulder in a playful matter. 

He was exhausted, to say the least, but staying bedridden was not an option at this point since that seemed to be the only thing they had been doing for the past five and a half weeks since they had been back and they had already postponed their comeback since the event had taken place. 

The sound of sneakers squeaking against the dance floor fills their ears. It is comforting to hear the music and the rhythmic movements of their bodies. It feels almost normal, if only they were able to join in on the fun. 

A sigh slips past his lips, and he can’t tell if it is contentment or exhaustion but all-in-all it feels relaxing. 

Taeyong moves swiftly into the center on them all, moving his body quickly, and Ten finds himself smiling at the complexity of their routine that he made look effortless. To be honest, he felt better watching them and having Taeyong there at his side recently. They shared a peculiar connection that he could not put words to. 

But, they made them feel grounded in a sense, allowing them to express themself even with everything that had happened, and better yet, they were beginning to feel comforted in the fact that the horrid events of that evening had been obscured and that netizens had not poked and prodded at the ambiguous images that had been released. More so, they were still disquieted at the fact that they had been struggling to still share skinship, but was advised that this was a normal reaction to trauma.  
Regardless, they were beginning to feel better and relished the moments of peace that they felt at this moment. 

He listens to the sounds of the musicians gets lost in its sounds before they feel their phone vibrate against their pocket. He removes it slowly, eyes still fixed on the mirror where he watched the reflections of the other as they dance around. 

His eyes flutter to the screen where a video message is displayed from an unknown number, they stare at it for a moment but quickly sit it off to the side since they had this happen often and assumed that it was a fan who had somehow gotten his number. 

They watch as the music comes to an end and most of the members collapse to the ground gasping and whining at the choreographer for forcing them to perform the routine again since they did not feel that the first time around was sufficient. 

Yangyang collapses at his side, breathing heavily before Ten hands him a bottle of water where he nods his thanks before guzzling down the fluids. 

“I think they are trying to kill us.” He whines, before placing the half-empty bottle down and leaning backwards to rest his head against the wall. 

“Nah, you are just out of shape.” Ten teases with a wink at the younger. 

They receive a glare in return before they laugh at what the older had said. “Do you really think so?” 

“Nah,” He responds before turning his attention back to his phone after feeling its vibration again to see another message displaying that a text was sent with a video attachment, along with a text from Lisa that was asking if he was okay. 

The question was peculiar, but he allowed it to slide since his responses had been slower than usual. He begins to stand a moment later, he wanted to walk around and stretch his legs, needed to get some fresh air to fill his lungs or just some movement to get his blood running. 

“I’ll be back,” He says, but the other is no longer paying attention as they are staring down at their phone screen with a furrowed brow. 

Ten doesn’t bother to ask what he is looking at as they were normally in a text war with the others and was probably thinking of a snarky response to throw back at the others.

He scoffs at the thought before heading out into the hall, walking mindlessly towards the stalls where he plans to clean his face with some cold water. 

His phone chirps again in his pocket, once, twice, three times, four. It is consecutive at this point. Slowly he pulls his phone from his pocket and sees several messages, another from Lisa asking him to answer the text, another is from Baekyun asking him if they had seen the news and if they were all right and another from the same unknown number. 

They can’t help the palpitation of their heart as their phone begins to ignite with different names and texts. Before he can think he clicks on the unknown text and sees the black screen with a play button in the center of the screen. He hesitates for a moment more before clicking the center to play the video. 

It starts out with laughter and the sound of a struggling breath before something loud rings through the speakers and the squeaking of metal clanking closed and a lock being pulled reverberates through the area. The screen is still black until they see two figures begin to form, the one figure is almost completely blurred out whilst the one that struggles beneath the other's form comes to light. 

Ten feels his heart drop into the pit of his stomach s the video begins to play on and the notifications from others linger at the top of the screen. 

“This can’t be happening…” He thinks this, as he watches on in horror, barely able to peel his eyes from the screen before the phone falters from his grasp.

-

Yang Yang had not recognized the number or understood why someone would send him a video with a smiling emoji attached to it. But pure curiosity was his weakness. He hears Ten beside him declaring that he was going to be back but does not bother to acknowledge it as he clicks play on the video. 

The screen is blank and there are muffled noises that he can not make out so he grabs his headphones from his pant pocket and slips it into his ear. He hears the sounds more clearly now, with snickers and moans coming through his ears. 

His heart begins to palpitate as the screen starts to clear and he sees two bodies, one that lays on the ground struggling feebly beneath the frame that lays over top of the other completely blurred out aside from the whimpering form beneath him. 

It only takes the young rapper a moment to wrap his head around it and suddenly he feels his body shaking, what the hell was this?!

The Thai members voice is muffled by a piece of cloth and there are labored breaths as the person holding the camera moves around the body and leans down to film closer to his face where he sees blood coagulating around his head and tinges of crimson stuck to his dyed locks. 

“Shhh, baby, be good for me.” The voice is muffled and grunting behind the other as they cry out past the material, brows knitted together and tears spilling freely down their face. “Fuck, fuck.” 

He barely registers what happens next before he is chucking his phone across the room and lets out a horrid cry. He can still hear the sound in his headphones. Labored breaths and half-heard screams but it doesn’t last long before he tears the headphone from his ear and tosses it. 

“Oh fuck.” He cries, clasping his hand over his mouth as a cry slithers through them. “What the fuck!” He is sobbing now, the images rolling through his head. There is someone beside him grabbing at his arm and he realizes that it is Mark. “Ten, oh god.” He can’t help it, he is hysterical at this point. “I can’t… oh god.” 

Mark doesn’t wait another moment before he is up sprinting from the room and running swiftly down the hall where he sees Ten’s discarded phone where a video is seen playing across the screen. The boy doesn’t have to look long, doesn’t have to acknowledge what he sees, he knows what it is from the sounds coming from the device. 

Without a second thought, he runs down the hall and heads towards the stalls knowing exactly where their brother is. He slams the doors open and sees where their body is lying halfway out of the stall door where they continue to heave over top of the toilet emptying the contents of their stomach. 

He moves more cautiously before approaching them and sees their small frame wrapped around the toilet, hair dangling around his face and sweat coagulating at his brow. 

“Hyung,” he gasps, falling to his knees beside him in the small space. “I’m so sorry.”

He is hesitant to touch him, to make him uncomfortable to destroy what is left of his sanity. 

“How?” They finally gasp before pulling away from the toilet and grasping their head. “How could they?..” He can’t contain the pain that is radiating through his body, he feels every ounce of that terror ringing through him again, as though he was experiencing it for the first time again. 

He moves his shaking hands to grasp at his side and cries out sounding like an animal in pain. He wants to hide, to fall in on himself, but he is stuck here in this moment where there is no escape. 

Where they have exposed him and his terror for the world to see. Mark’s phone begins to vibrate and the stalls fill with sounds. 

Just what in the hell is going on?


	7. Promise

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, lovelies! Sorry I have been slow to update I am just existing at this point... Let me know what you think in the comments below! And thank you for taking the time to read my story! I love you guy's!

It had been a week filled with terror and stress. With every corner they turned there was another piece of information that they were learning and more social media coverage. 

They had barely been able to leave their dorm let alone attend their practices without reporters swarming them and at this time their lives had been put on a hold.

More importantly, they were constantly discussing whatever they could with the police who had been assigned to the case and had been back in constant communication with them regarding the release of the video to the public but did not have any new leads that were promising to find these bastards. 

Not to mention the apprehension that was radiating through the members and the fact that Ten had been locked away in his room once again, with barely any contact with the others. It was crazy how quickly someone with high spirited energy could fall into themselves when facing trauma. 

The whole video had left them feeling awful and empty. Most of the members had seen the horrendous video and had been silent for the past few days unable to truly comprehend what had happened. They had hurt their member and the sounds of desperation that ran through their speakers was sickening. 

The very thought sends chills through them and what made it worse was the desperate cries to their members that never came to their aid. They had left him to suffer. And for that they were feeling the dread and hatred towards themselves inwardly. However, without the regard that they could not prevent others horrendous actions from taking place. And all they could do was be there for each other, but even here they were failing.

If anything they were also worried that he wasn’t going to pull out of it this time. 

After all, this situation was different. The photos that had originally been released to the public were blurry and easy to cover up; however, there were no lies to be made for a ten-minute video that everyone and their mother had been able to view online. It was an act of debauchery that these individuals were taking pleasure in watching and it was disquieting, to say the least. 

Mark walks from the kitchen with a cup of coffee in his shaking grasp, he knew that the Taiwan dancer would probably reject the offer but he couldn’t help but feel the need to be there, he needed them right now, he needed them back then too, and Mark felt that dread in having left them in staying behind to go over the godforsaken schedules. 

He lets out a deep sigh before stopping outside of the room that was shared amongst Ten and WinWin. 

Not even WinWin had been able to get through to him, though he had been spending many sleepless nights at his side and tried to heedlessly make up for his lack of sleep during the morning. 

Mark knocks lightly on the door before turning the doorknob and pushing the door open. To his surprise, he sees that the dancer is nowhere in sight and wonders if the sounds he heard coming from the bathroom had been him grabbing a shower. 

He walks further into the darkened room where the curtains were pulled closed blocking out the sun that had peeked through the dark winter clouds, but the fabric kept the light from peering through and shedding any ounce of light into the room.

After a moment he walks to the dancer's messy bed where his sheets and blanket are tossed to the side and the fabrics are ruffled and barely clinging to the mattress. There was discarded clothing at the front of his bed and his pillows had been tossed to the side with one hanging partly off the bed and the other on its side. 

Before moving to pick up the mess in front of him he places the coffee down on the wooden nightstand and begins by grabbing the blanket where he sees the other phone lying opened beneath his covers. 

If the disorderly state of his bed had not already been a clear indicator that they were suffering the fact that they left their phone unattended and beneath the covers was enough. 

He reaches for the device and is ready to place it off to the side but halts when he sees images dancing across the screen and finds himself drawn to the many comments that are filtering through. 

He knows he shouldn’t be looking, this was not his place, but the comments were begging for them to look through.

“What a slut.”

“God, he was f*****g asking to get f****d” 

“Seriously? You guy’s are messed up!”

“He was askin and they provided”

“Holy S**t is this real? I nev thought he would get what he was asking for” 

“Slut”

“I would kill to be them. LOL.”

“Knew this would happen, you shouldn't put yourself out there like that, you are just asking for it”

“Guess they finally…” 

Mark feels his heart beating against his chest as he clicks away from the comments and quickly pulls up the article seeing that it was a public platform discussing the video, and the worst part was that it was viewable, his whole nightmare was on this platform for these people to watch. 

“Oooh, someone’s gettin some!” 

“What a disgusting whore.”

“What the f**k is wrong with you people?! This is F****n real! The F**K?”

“I could bang that.” 

“What are you doing?” The voice comes from behind him and Mark nearly drops the phone before flipping around to see the smaller male standing in the entrance of the room where his damp tresses are hanging loosely around his face. 

“Hyung.” Mark stammers, he looks back down at the device before it is roughly pulled from his hands and the dancer clicks it off and gives him a leveled look. “Hyung, what the fuck? Why are you looking at that? They don’t know…” 

“Why were you in my phone?” Ten says this with a low growl to his voice, which would have been more menacing had he not sounded exhausted and weighed down by an unseeable force. 

“That stuff they are saying is not true, it is fucking disgusting! Please, you can’t do this to yourself.” Mark is near tears at this point and he can’t tell if it is because of the comments or the fact that his hyung had been consecutively viewing this garbage. “Hyung,” 

“Just leave it, okay.” He says this with ease before turning his back to him where he attempts to make an exit from the room but is stopped.

“Hyung.” Mark starts before reaching out to grab his shoulder but is quickly shirked off and is met with a fearful yet enraged gaze. 

“Don’t fucking touch me!” He doesn’t mean to scream it, hell he doesn’t even mean to say it. His head is warm and his stomach feels tight. “They are right! I flaunted myself around and lived without caution! I fucking asked for it!” 

There are tears in his hazel eyes that go flooding down his ashen cheeks. His eyes look so heavy with exhaustion and his small frame was shaking. 

“Don’t tell me how I should feel!” His lips are trembling causing his voice to shake. 

“Hyung,” Mark tries again. “I’m sorry, I didn’t…”

“I can’t do this! I didn’t ask for this! For Christ's sake, I just wanted to go out!” His eyes that once brimmed with tears are now leaking the clear liquid, and there is so much emotion radiating in his voice that brakes through the barriers that he had built up through the past week. “I feel fucking gross… everyone is treating me like I am broken…” He wraps a hand around his abdomen whilst the other clasps around his mouth where his sobs sashay past his fingers that do nothing to silence the cries. “I said no, I said fucking no… I swear”

Mark doesn’t hesitate before he moves forward and pulls them into his embrace, he pulls him closer to his chest hand resting behind his head and tangling into his wet locks. 

“I’m sorry” He whispers the only words he can think and suddenly his lips are moving before he can think. “God, I am so sorry hyung, I should have been there. I’m sorry.” He feels the tears that had threatened his eyes spill over like a stream of water and without realizing he feels his legs buckle beneath him bringing them both to their knees where he continues to hold the shaking member. 

Ten begins to shake his head, but he can barely make the words out that he is trying to say through the sobs. Until he moves closer and he hears the hiccuped words of lament sashaying past Chit’s lips.

“I should have known, I did this… I’m sorry.” 

Mark knows it’s time to seek out help, to move forward in this healing process through this open wound. He knows that their silence has probably been defining to their member, and giving them space seemed more of a punishment than anything. 

“We’re here for you, hyung.” Mark breathes the words out through a hiccuped cry. “I promise.” 

“I can’t do this, I can’t even function.” Ten cries out before reaching a hand up to clutch at the other's shirt. “I’m so tired.” 

“I know,” Mark replies before petting his head. “I know.” 

Truly, did he actually know? He had not been the one to experience it but he had been there to see the aftermath of the putrid event. These people had taken so much from their brother, and for what? Lust? To say they could? If he knew who they were he would quite literally kill them. 

He shifts his body so that they are lying on their hip and continues to shush the other member before looking towards the door knowing that the others had to have heard the screaming, and were probably lingering nearby contemplating their next steps. 

“We are going to get through this.” His voice is hoarse and sounds harsh against his own ears, but he needed to hear this, needed to know. “We are here for you, hyung. And I won’t let you go through this alone.”

They, wouldn’t let him go through this alone. Right? -

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments are my caffeination so drop one if you would like! Thank you for reading! And feel free to drop any ideas in the comments below!

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you times a million for reading! ✨✨Kudos and comments give me life✨✨ Also, stay safe and have a great week!


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